I saw the new Friday the 13th yesterday. I did not enjoy the movie so much because I do not care for horror movies unless they have zombies or Buffy the vampire slayer or cats in them. My biggest problem was early on Jason killed a lady by putting her in a sleeping bag and hanging the bag a foot over a fire. That is no way to kill a person. Even if the person was too dumb to unzip the bag, what kind of industrial strength zippers do they put in sleeping bags. The zipper on my backpack exploded when I tried to zip it shut with my blanket and 18 toys inside. Yet I am expected to believe she has some kind of super zipper that hold a 6 hundred pound lady. I am estimating her weight at 600 pounds because sometimes she took up most of the movie screen so in real life she must be about 20 feet tall. So even if the zipper does not break the material would burn through and she would fall in the fire and roll out and be burnt a little, but alive. Not in this film. She fell out and was dead. I wish the movie making folks would stop filling my movies with lies. I spent most of the rest of the movie thinking about what I would do if I were in a sleeping bag over a fire.
I would get out.
On the upside, if you see the movie you can go read that hump Ebert’s review after and laugh at how he is not very good at reviewing movies.
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