Today I did things.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

First I woke up, then I went to the library, then i chugged a beer, then I went back to sleep.  Then the librarian woke me up and asked me to leave.  Bitch.

But seriously, seriously has 3 vowels in a row in it thats weird.

Really though, Californication is a really good show.  I just watched the first episode of the new season and it is still good.  

I’m done talking.

I would like to thank my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ for making this all happen!

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Flying Cars! Flying Cars finally are available to the general public.  We test drove one today, you just fly up in the air, no need for roads.  You do not even need a special license! And they are pretty reasonably priced.  I drove a 2 seater with 2 cigarette lighters, 2 yellow fog lights and a bad ass roof rack and even with those posh options it came in at just over 15k American.  And because the Cleveland Browns love us they are going to pick up the insurance bill for the first 3 years we own this handsome flying car.  And they say dreams  don’t come true.  

I should have said Washington Redskins, Cleveland Browns sounds kindof racist.

Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus

Monday, January 3, 2011

A shark jumps out of the ocean when an airplane is flying over and catches the airplane in its mouth and crashes it into the ocean.  And Debbie Gibson is in it.  Full of win.  That is my review of Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus.  It is the first movie I have given 5 stars on netflix in a long time.  

In 2011 the same folks seem to be releasing Mega Python versus Gatoroid, it has Debbie Gibson and Tiffany in it.  I like the addition of more old pop stars, I am hoping for MC Hammer in the next ridiculous movie, but I am disappointed that snakes are sooooooo dumb.  I would rather see this Gatoroid fight the Mega Shark or the Giant Octopus. 

Finally

Saturday, January 1, 2011

It is 2011.  Last night I was watching the New Year thing and saw some dumb rappers.  They mentioned sizzurp or something like that.  I looked at the wikipedia entry for this thing.  You apparently mix some medicine with codine and sprite and a Jolly Rancher.  Jolly Ranchers are the only thing we have of these ingredients.  But we do have NyQuill and coconut water.  Hmmmmm...

See you tomorrow 2011!

Nude Queers Eve!!!

Friday, December 31, 2010

Pretend I said New Years Eve, I guess that was one of those times when I said what I was thinking instead of what I wanted to say.  Too bad it is soooooo much work to delete that heading and change it to New Years Eve.  Anyway it does not matter because I am from a planet where dogs rule things and we are nude, Donald Duck style, meaning we sometimes wear shirts but almost never pants and usually nothing at all and queer means odd or the band the queers because we do not have a negative view of the gays like you grumpy biggoted earthlings.  

There, rationalized, I accept your apolology earthling.

Picture unrelated, Earthling.

The cat still lives here.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Look at this puddle of fur.  I feel like in the next 50 years or so dogs will evolve and become bipedal.  Cats, if this one is any example, are trying to evolve to take the shape of whatever container they are put in.  True.  Test it.  Pick up a dog, stays dog shaped, pick up a cat, folds damn near in half.  I rest my case.

In 60 years I think dogs will own radio stations.

BOOOOOOOOOO, cooties.

Monday, December 27, 2010
In all my 5 years I have played 100 games.  There is a new worst.  Cooties.  I am disappointed in my self for playing the one game of this game I will ever play to completion.  I won.   But at what cost?

On the bright side I have a newfound respect for Peggle on the Iphone, now thats a game.

Merry Christmas

Saturday, December 25, 2010

christmas eve...

Friday, December 24, 2010
Come on, that is pretty clever for a dog.

i am 5

Thursday, December 23, 2010
Today, I am 5.  It turns out as proven by the lack of entires from when I was 4 that the inventors and scientists took the year off.  There was almost nothing to talk about.  Maybe more will happen this year.